Not ready

I don't believe in coincidence but if I did, your timing fits the bill. I'm not ready. I don't want to slip back into you but if I did, old habits rush right back. I'm not ready. I don't trust us but if I did, I'd say we can be friends. I'm not ready. I [...]

Enthusiasm

I'm reclaiming the enthusiasm of my childhood.What can I hold responsible for it's decline?Inhibition.Fear.Shame."Failure".Getting excited, displaying enthusiasm, is vulnerable.It's visibly showing that I'm jazzed about something.I'm so into whatever it is, in fact, that I can't contain myself.My excitement spills out in laughter,my eyes light up,I lean in,I start talking with my hands,I get consumed [...]

Clean Closure

The word "closure" gets thrown around a lotat the end of a relationship.When all is said and done,everybody wants "closure".Here's the thing about closure and relationships-it's messy.My father is a surgeonand a great one at that.Recently, he told me about a simple technique he uses.After he draws the line to mark his incision,he draws lines [...]

More Than

I found my mind wandering in the shower this morning.These thoughts were being spurred by the new Shawn Mendes album,which I am obsessed with and play in it's entirety fairly regularly."Why did I stay? And why the hell did I keep coming back?"Why did I stay when I knew there were still problemsin spite of [...]

Slow Down

I've always had trouble slowing down.I think it's because I'm afraid of not having enough time.I've been hearing a lot about this "culture of scarcity".Time is a non-renewable resources.You can't recycle or reuse it.Once it's gone, it's gone.Attention is the same.For most of my life, I have operated under this idea that multi-tasking was my [...]

Tough Pills to Swallow

Money doesn't fix everything.The Serenity Prayer"I haven't been trying for a while.""No.""You are not for everyone."NostalgiaBreak-upsDreams fadeTaxesThe end of an "era"Leaving an old homeLeaving an old lifeI am exactly where I'm supposed to be.My parents don't know it all.I am going to have to answer some things for myself.I cannot do it all.It's ok to [...]

Love Was

Love was a lazy morning after a busy night,swapping stories over $1 pizza and gelato,Clos Rougeard before coffee.Love was going to see every Pixar movie in theaters,letting you win the round of mini golf,forcing me to bowl without bumpers on my 24th birthday.Love was COS Cerasuolo in plastic cups and burgers on the terrace,pregaming dinner [...]

A Statement of Beliefs

I believe in changeand that it's the only guarantee in life.I believe everyone has something to sayand anyone can be a writer.I believe that parents are doing the best they canand there is no single right way to raise a child.I believe in intuitionand listening your gut.I believe in pushing the reset buttonand taking steps [...]

Trying

I am upset with you.I am hopeful for you.Aren't we on the same team?Don't we want the same thing?I am trying.Are you trying?Nothing worthwhile comes easy.Everything worthwhile brings joy.