A bad habit.

I have a bad habit. It’s been really hard for me to shake. It comes up less than it used to but most recently, I was watching something alone and I let myself imagine what it would’ve been like to watch with you. I thought about the moments I’d want to ask you about. I thought about what you might say. I thought about how great it is to talk with you.

I’m trying so hard to break the habit but I still want to know your thoughts. I love hearing your thoughts because in those moments, in those conversations, I get to know you. I wish so badly that I could watch a great movie and not think of you. Some day. I wish things were different.

I liked this movie. I especially liked the opening. I thought it was a brilliantly tragic way to start. Writing all the things you love about the person you’re divorcing. Playing back the memories. I wonder what you’d write about me.

I know. Bad habit.

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