A weird time

It’s a weird time. The normal order of things has been completely disrupted by a virus that has proven to be impossible to contain. It’s been 3 weeks since I left New York. It feels weird. Society is on pause but life marches on.

What am I going to do with all this time? All the things I’d normally want to do aren’t even on the table. Going out. Seeing friends. I’m living in lockdown in the middle of the woods. It’s amazing. I know it’s not going to be like this for forever so I’m really enjoying it right now.

I stopped wearing a watch. It doesn’t matter what time it is. My time is mine to do whatever I want with. I haven’t woken up to an alarm since I got here. I sleep as much as I want/need to. I’m drinking more water and less alcohol. Haven’t been able to smell or taste anything for 2 weeks and I’m a little congested. It’s more annoying than anything else. I love food but it’s a drag to not be able to fully smell or taste. It’s annoying but what’s the point in complaining? It’ll be like this until it’s not, right?

Maybe I have it. It’s weird to think about.

I was looking out the window at the mountains the other night and I found myself thinking, “At least I can see. I can live without smell or taste but sight? That would be really hard.” I’d also have a hard time not being able to hear. Music brings me so much.

He sent me a playlist. I love playlists. I think you can tell a lot about a person from their playlists. Good music is so satisfying. When you find a song that hits the spot and it gets into your bones and it just feels right for whatever moment you’re in- mm it’s nice. I have a lot of fun making playlists. They’re personal.

Funny to see who’s coming into and out of my life right now. I’m trying to see beyond the duality of good and bad without making it complicated. And even though I’m finding beauty in simplicity, it’s still a weird time.

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